I remember when I was a new mother, I got to that 6 week postpartum mark and was excited. I was thrilled with the prospect of feeling like myself again. Hell if the doctors say I can have sex and exercise again, I must be healed and healthy and well…right?!
Nope. Not even a little.
It was very common for me to see other new mom’s in the blogging world or on tv who were up and doing sports and having fun and living life once that hit that magic 6 weeks. But I have to tell you that’s crap.
Maybe it’s true for some women, but for me it wasn’t and seeing it presented as the norm was soul crushing for me. I was a mama who had such terrible depression and anxiety that I could’t handle being alone with my baby for more than an hour. My husband was going to job interviews and I would sob in our bedroom until he got home.
I was a mama who bled until about 11 weeks postpartum and sex wasn’t fun for a long long time after birth.
I was a mama who didn’t get the hang of this mama thing until my son was about 16 months old.
I was a mama who suck fuck it to life and almost all other responsibilities except keeping myself and my child alive until a little after a year postpartum.
I gave myself a break, I let things go, there was huge slack given to myself because I needed it. I allowed myself that time to heal and just be with myself because that’s what my postpartum journey looked like, that’s what new mamahood was for me.
If your new mamahood journey happens to be that you are able to get back to normal life, mentally, physically and emotionally around 6 weeks then that is fantastic! I am so happy for you! But keep in mind the rest of us and give us a helping hand sometimes.
If your new mamahood journey happens to be that you need 6 months, 8 months, a year or more to feel like you can get back to normal life, mentally, physically, and emotionally…then I understand and you are just as normal as the rest.
All of our paths are unique and motherhood even more so! If you need to give yourself a break, if you need to be gentle then do it, mama! If you want to try for a 5k when your baby is only 3 months (and your doc gives the ok!) then do it, mama!
Whatever you need, it’s okay to ask for it and take it for yourself.
PS: I can’t think of a time when you need – and *deserve* – more support than when you’re a new mama looking after a newborn baby.
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